Lady In Red
by destroyedparadise234
Summary: "THEY SHAVED MY LEGS, ENGLAND! It's never grow back the same!" The nations and their bosses are at the annual ball. There, England finds America wearing a rather interesting outfit. Songfic, OOC-ness, slight UKUS and Spamano


A/N: I seriously don't know where this came from, all i know is that my mom kept on listening to 80s music and this song always came up. It's Lady in Red by Chris De Burgh

Warning: Slight yaoi, crack, some curses

Sorry if there are spelling and grammatical errors ^^

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><p><em><strong>I've never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight,<br>I've never seen you shine so bright,  
>I've never seen so many men ask you if you wanted to dance,<br>They're looking for a little romance, given half a chance,**_

England wasn't sure whether he should have just gone home right away, cried in frustration, or laughed his ass off at his former colony's perdicament. For the sake of pride, he decided to do the latter.

The sequence of the outfit was bit much, the light reflecting off of America's outfit was almost blinding him. He hid behind a few other people at the party, knowing that the younger nation was probably looking for him somewhere. What? He wanted to enjoy the show.

He watched as America, with as much pride he could muster in this situation, walk through the crowd, looking for him. He had a small blush and was fidgeting under the other people's gaze.

Cute.

England saw a couple of men asking America to dance and nearly cried laughing when America started to beat the crap out of France when he asked America to dance. England usually would have felt slightly bad for France (America had one hell of a punch), but the man _touched_ America's ass in the process of asking him. The bloody pervert deserved the beating.

_**And I have never seen that dress you're wearing,  
>Or the highlights in your hair that catch your eyes,<br>I have been blind;**_

England knew he should have been mad at America for coming to the official ball for the nations and their bosses in a bloody dress, a bright red one at that. Even worse the ball took place in Japan this time. But he couldn't help but think how adorable he looked. The Great America was practically blushing like a school girl.

England figured that America probably heard his laughing when he saw the giant ball of red and ego hurling his way. America tackled England, sending them both to the floor. The people around them started to either laugh or walk away. England guessed that maybe the sight two nations on the ground, one of which was crossdressing, tangled up together would scare anyone. He swore he heard a camera flash though...

"ENGLAND! YOU'VE GOTTA HELP ME!" America started to wail on top of the older nation. England quickly pushed America off himself before pulling them both off of the floor.

"Now, America. Please explain to me calmly-"

"Dude! Some jackass knocked me out while I was getting ready for the party! All I remember was that I was almost done looking heroicly handsome, which I always do of course but I needed to add a little bit of touch ups, and the suddenly some guy like knocks me out! And when I woke up, I was in a closet in _this_!" America ruffled the too-short dress in emphasis.

"And that's not the worse part, there's no zipper on this thing! I have no idea how the hell the guy put this on me, but I can't find a way to take it off!" America was practically crying at this point. He suddenly grabbed England's shoulders and started shaking him.

"England, they shaved my legs! Look!" America grabbed England's hand and put on his thighs for England to feel, not noticing how England turned red at the action. It took all of his self control not to squeeze and grope America's now-smooth legs.

"THEY SHAVED IT! England, it's never gonna grow back the same!" America was now crying and was shaking England back and forth faster now.

"America! Calm down, it's just hair!"

"NO! It's not just hair! My leg hair used to soft, but now it's gonna grow darker and hard! It's never the same England!" America stopped shaking England and was now sniffling. He looked up and his eyes widened. He looked like he was about to faint.

"Oh shit."

**_The lady in red is dancing with me, cheek to cheek,  
>There's nobody here, it's just you and me,<br>It's where I want to be,  
>But I hardly know this beauty by my side,<br>I'll never forget the way you look tonight;_**

"Oh crap, my boss! I can't let him see me like this!" America grabbed England's hand and started to pull him to the dance floor.

"W-what the bloody hell are you doing!"

"Dance with me, dammit! Maybe my boss won't see me, then you can help me get out of these clothes." England blushed at America's choice of words and blushed even further when America buried his head in the crook of his neck.

"A-america!"

"Shut up!" England tried to push the man off of him and nealry screamed when his own boss popped up behind him.

"Ah, Arthur! There you are! And who is this fine young woman?" England blushed and pried America away. At least he wasn't wearing his glasses so he looked a little bit less than his usual self.

"Uh... I don't know..." America face palmed.

"Well, it was very nice to meet you but we have to get going now. Bye!" England winced at he horrible falsetto voice as he was dragged away by America from a very confused Brittish man.

_**I've never seen you looking so gorgeous as you did tonight,**_  
><em><strong>I've never seen you shine so bright, you were amazing,<strong>_  
><em><strong>I've never seen so many people want to be there by your side,<strong>_  
><em><strong>And when you turned to me and smiled, it took my breath away,<strong>_

America and England barreled down the ballroom trying to avoid eye contact with the other countries' bosses.

"America slow down! Bloody hell, how are you running so fast in heels?" England struggled to keep up with America and they headed towards the exit.

"Almost there...Woah!" America slid a little bit on the floor and noticed that some champagne spilled there.

"Wow, that was clos- GAAH!" England knocked into America and the force caused them both to tumble and slide on the marble floor, all the way to the giant and very expensive looking cake.

"Shit!" England cursed as he felt cake seep into his clothes and coughed when some of the colored sugar powder fall on him. For god's sake, it looked like glitter. His skin was now sparkling.

"Dammit, America! Why'd you suddenly stop? Now I look like one of you stupid vampires*!" England tried to glare at America but couldn't when he saw America giggling as China's boss licked so cake off his arm.

Quite honestly, he couldn't fathom why America was giggling. If China's boss did that o him he would probably freak the hell out. The sight itself was actually pretty disturbing.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING! ARU!" China grabbed his boss's tail and started beating him on the head with a Kitty doll.

"That looks so awsome kesesesese!" Prussia proceede to jump into the cake, followed by France, then by Spain who dragged Romano along, then by Italy who followed his brother, then by Germany who feared that Italy might find a way to hurt himself in the cake.

Spain started to grope Romano, only to be stopped when Japan popped out of nowhere.

"Hold it right there! Don't you two know about my country's laws? I will not allow sex scenes in stories that don't have an "M" rating attached!"

"Relax Japan, we haven't be able to do it in so long! Now, please stop breaking the fourth wall-"

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH!"

All in all, it was turning out to be a disaster.

_**And I have never had such a feeling,  
>Such a feeling of complete and utter love, as I do tonight;<strong>_

All the nations looked up when they heard someone coughing rather loudly.

"H-hey boss! You need a cough drop or something?" America grinned sheepishly at his boss.

His boss was not amused.

England was grinning at the perdicament America was in, but nearly screamed when his boss grabbed him by the ear.

"England. Explanation. Now."

England turned to America and glared as America laughed at him.

"I swear when we get out of here I'm going to feed you to my unicorn."

_**The lady in red is dancing with me, cheek to cheek,  
>There's nobody here, it's just you and me,<br>It's where I want to be,  
>But I hardly know this beauty by my side,<br>I'll never forget the way you look tonight;**_

Five hours after the party ended, England and America were still trying to clean the entire ballroom up. America was still stuck in his dress as 'punishment', and unforunately said dress was so short that every time America would try to kneel on the floor to pick something up, it would ride up. England was having a very difficult time keeping himself from molesting his former charge.

"This is your fault."

"How is this my fault?"

"If you didn't knock me into the cake, we wouldn't be in this mess!" America huffed and bent down to pick up a piece of cake. England raised a massive eyebrow.

"...are you wearing panties?"

"Kiss my Star-Spangled ass."

_**I never will forget the way you look tonight...  
>The lady in red, the lady in red,<br>The lady in red, my lady in red,**_

I love you...

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><p>*lol twilight reference.<p>

And I forgot to mention before Japan's line was from the doujinshi page I saw XD I wasn't sure what doujin it was from but I think it's Pirate Chronicles (not sure) except Japan was yelling that to England and America. (thnks for reminding me NAnaNAnNAi ^^)

Story Behind this story: I really wanted tp write a story that had the line "kiss my star-spangled ass" in it and my mom was always listening to this song and it got stuck in my head . I actually wrote another story with this last night but didn't like how it turned out (it was like fluff .) so I rewrote it today XD

I'm so sorry I haven't been able to update "Everything about you" in a while but I'm almost finished with the third chapter^^

I hope you enjoyed this crack/song fic ^^


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